First weekend of 2014

Hi,

My first weekend of 2014 hasn’t been the best. Although I don’t really have anything to compare it to, I know I can do better.

Friday started bad and I guess it just went down hill from there.

Last year (damn, that sounds far away!) I had a lot of trouble with sleeping at night due to anxiety, so I got medication (topomax for nightmares + something else for sleeping (promethazine is the dutch word)) but the lats one is a real bitch. I’m sorry, but it’s true. I am SO thirsty. I go to the toilet every hour. I drink a LOT. Which isn’t really helpful for my wallet. My tummy isn’t really happy as well, it’s a nice side effect of medication and on top of that I have a lot of headache’s. BUT I do sleep earlier! So…..

–                                                              +
Headache                                           Better sleep
A lot of pee-ing
A lot of drinking
Dry mouth
Tummy ache

Hm…. I do like sleep, but I think this might be too much con’s.

Tomorrow is therapy day. A part of me is really happy and the other part of me is a little bit frightened about going back to the daily routine. Which means I’m getting closer to may, closer to getting released from the treatment centre I’m currently at now. Closer to change. While I really feel I’m not ready yet.

Right now I’m just nagging about the medication because I’m afraid I wont be able to sleep tonight because I won’t be taking it tonight. It’s just ‘here we go again’, the long wait till it’s 4.30 am and maybe, maybe I just might fall asleep just to wake up at 7 am to go to therapy.

xoxo
Brianna

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