Christmas Eve & Growth?


So I actually have a LOT to talk about, and it’s 3.30 am and bestie just went to bed, me too, but since I’m not tired I wanted to write about today.

I woke up kinda feeling depressed, not wanting to do anything, but as the day went on I got a little more excited. It did fall down a lot as things went wrong (you know, just small things that Always go wrong when you’re in a hurry or something like that πŸ˜‰ )but when she arrived actually everything turned out okay πŸ™‚

We went to dinner and it was soooo much fun! We went to an Italian restaurant and it was delicious! 3 course dinner! Yummy πŸ˜€
After that, back to my house talked up till 3 and decided to go to bed.

I just really enjoyed myself. We really talked again about 1000 things πŸ˜›

And suddenly Brandon came up..
(Last week, Wednesday, i was feeling really bad because of the holiday and not having any talks anymore so I asked Brandon if I could talk to him after therapy, since we didn’t have a scheduled appointment. He said he was booked the whole afternoon, so I asked for a phone call on thursday which wasn’t a problem (yep I’m not a phone person, but i just asked it so I could get ‘rid’ of him.. you know :$ ? Without the whole awkward ‘i asked something and you said no’-situation) Β later (15 minutes before my taxi was supposed to arrive) I got the message that he did have time, so if i wanted i could go anyways, but it was too late for me to reschedule the taxi, so I couldn’t. So i called him, and asked if I could email him what was on my mind and just write it all down (since i get really irritated on the phone). But he told me he’s not an email person (-.-) so maybe I could email him, and he’d answer me by calling me. So i was like; ok that sounds reasonable. But then i’d have to email the secretariat and they would fast forward the mail to Brandon, and I was like; what the hell! You can’t ask me to put my thoughts on paper and send it to THEM! So in the end i never send and email and he never called)
Anyways, i was pissed πŸ˜› so I talked to bestie about that, but while talking i realized something…… I’m being stupid haha.

I am mad… but why?

I used to like Brandon. Why? Because he’s steady. he doesn’t give in, doesn’t run after me etc (no roller coaster effect)

So now i’m mad, why? Because he’s not running after me πŸ˜› ! When actually, him not running after me is what i like about him. Because that means he’s the person who keeps his head cool when my head is about to turn to 100 degrees.

Kinda childish behaviour, like it’s a subconscious test or something like that.. from me to him. Well he sure passed that one xD
Damn… glad i figured this one out. otherwise I’d be complaining untill I’d see him again, and probably be sitting stubborn across from him when we’d have an appointment πŸ˜› hahaha anyhow it’d be time loss for me πŸ˜‰ so no win.

overall Christmas Eve was GREAT! πŸ™‚
Nobody can take that away from me πŸ˜€


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