As good as it gets


So….. the flu.

So I’ve been inside my house since thursday, and I’m going insane 😉
I think this is as good as it gets. My nose is still running and I’m still coughing like my lungs are trying to get out, but I guess it’s the best for now.

Tomorrow therapy again. The gym-therapy is canceled for tomorrow so I’ll only have therapy till 12.30 pm which is incredibly short. Brandon isn’t there, and IF I want to talk to someone they’ll probably tell me to talk to Betty.. Well how about no? Got a talk scheduled Wednesday with Brandon again so I’ll just wait till Wednesday.

There has been so much going on in my head and the flu on top of that. Now it feels like back to real life.. and real life means back to ptsd, and I don’t want that. To be honest I’m at that point again where I want to deny me having ptsd. I just don’t want to talk let alone think about it. I don’t have ptsd ok.

Got bad news past week as in, I’ll have to pay a lot for Polly next year due to budget cuts and I can’t afford it. So I’m probably gonna lose Polly, and with losing Polly goes my whole ‘back-to-school’ plan… Seriously? They want people to get out of the whole welfare situations, but they make it impossible cause everything that might help gets cut. What the hell!

I just wish I didn’t have this cptsd.
I wish somethings were a little easier

Nights are still horrible though. Got like 2 types of medication from the psychiatrist, 1 of them is addictive so I have to stop with it somewhere next week, but I’m supposed to sleep a lot better. Well… If 3 or 4 am is a lot better… then we’re on the same page. I just thought 1 am might be a lot better -_- anyway, the new medication does help with flashbacks and nightmares so that is comforting… hmm I didn’t even have a flashback this weekend… funny! Didn’t even realise.

Anyway.. still fighting 😉 like I have a choice..


So hopefully, I’m back and activ on WordPress again!



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