I feel hung over… and not because I had some alcohol last night. But because I was feeling so good yesterday and high, like I could handle everything.
Right now I’m feeling kinda down. I don’t really know why. I want to sleep all day. Just lie in my bed and put the blankets over my head and sleep it away.
I feel a bit triggered, and I don’t even know what triggered me? I do have these sort of flashbacks, not very clear but they’re here. Things go through my mind, feelings through my body, it’s like I’m not save. Rationally I know I am save, I am at home, Polly was just here and we had a good talk. But I just want to sleep, get away from this world.
I did sleep ok, I fell a sleep very late though, but slept till 11.00, thought about Justy, fell a sleep a little bit more and woke up around 11.45, and Polly was already at the front door. (Woeps)
I don’t know why I am feeling low. I am going to try to find some distraction, there are movies I still want to watch and I’ve been saving them.
It feels like there are hands on my body, touching me, I don’t want them and when I look down at my body I don’t see anything. I just feel it, but I feel it in my head.. it’s weird to explain I guess.
I don’t know what’s the best thing to do right now. I guess I’m going back to bed. I feel a little bit more save there right now (weird huh?, at night I can feel very unsafe there)