Ssht, I’m trying to survive!

Hello,

I’ve been kind of quiet, but not intentionally.
Weekend was ok. Saturday I went to my sisters, it was really fun and nice. At home I did have a little ‘panick/yell’ attack, against my mum. Which ended in me crying and my mom wanting to comfort me but I can’t handle her doing that.
Sunday I got triggered big time, twice. Which made it difficult to sleep.

Therapy today was ok. I was in a laughing modus, as were some of the other girls which made it fun.
Brenda was a bit annoying since I didn’t bring my security blanket to therapy and she wanted it.

There is not much to say about my thoughts right now. At least, nothing new. Still same old drama; loneliness, trying to prevent crisis etc.
Kind of emotional again every now and then, more crying that usual. But I’m still here, unharmed.

A little worried about baby girl, she’s not doing well and I have a appointment at the vet tomorrow. She gets so stressed out at the vet 😦 poor thing.

It’s weird, I’m not depressed, but I have this depressed feeling. It’s like I’m walking on eggshells around myself. Don’t feel like doing much, just want to sleep. Especially since sleeping when it’s dark out is very difficult. I love to lie in bed during the day, just relaxing, with baby girl next to me and watching a movie.

Tomorrow Polly, the vet and the hairdresser (ugh, she’s coming to my mums house which means I have to be there as well. With her boyfriend. Well.. I’ll just make the best of it).
Wednesday therapy (+ a talk with Brandon)

 

xoxo
Brianna

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